Thursday, June 11, 2015

Held on - What all I lose when I hang on to poisonous emotional trash


Held on
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I have held on
to all the injuries
and wounds of the past.

It was my right
to be mad.
I was entitled to remain
hard-headed and stubborn.

The only thing I got rid of
was my aggression.
I shared it
with everyone.

I also hung onto
the feelings of guilt
about my own misconduct.
They were haunting me
and did not give me any peace.

I was constantly looking
for ulterior motives
when other people did anything good for me,
and interpreted so much
into their assumed motivation
that I could no longer
enjoy the goodness.

But I am slowly starting to realize
that I only make my life sour.

I have turned my time to hell
with the entire way I was thinking
and with everyone who could
avoid me
for their own protection.

For a long time I did not notice
that I had locked myself out
from true love
and instead turned more and more
mistrusting.

I was not interested in finding out
what the idea of soul hygiene meant
and did not know what to do
with forgiveness.

Oh what a poor wretch
I have turned into.
I can no longer enjoy life.

Maybe I should think about
leaving my past behind me
and searching for the positive
in each day.
Maybe the path of forgiveness
is the only successful one.

It does no good
to hold onto the
emotional poisonous trash
in my life.

Now I will start making
some more serious thoughts
about my own life,
and let go of this phase
of anger and grief
because all this time
I have held on to
the wrong thing!


Theme:   What all I lose when I hang on to poisonous emotional trash


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