Sunday, June 8, 2014

Obstructed love - What keeps me from experiencing true love


Obstructed Love
(0706130725-0748,080614-2047-2113)

Piece by piece
I have obstructed 
my own access
to your love.

More and more
I only had in my mind
what could be seen, felt
and tasted.
Material things
as well as power and prestige
became bigger priorities.

Soon I noticed
that they left me
unfulfilled as well.
But the world
did not offer anything else.
I had almost forgotten
that I was able to look
beyond the earthly things.

My own mistakes
obstructed my access
to your love.
It did not occur to me any longer
that you are gracious with me.

I was so busy with
trying to catch the luck and love
this world had to offer,
that I completely forgot you
as being the author of love.

My disobedience towards you,
my worldly shortsightedness,
my self-centered egotism,
and my stubbornness
were like the walls
in my own prison.

I had always been searching
for real and lasting love.
Deep down in my heart
I knew that it existed,
but by now
I no longer had any idea
how I could get ahold of it.

With all my luxury
I was imprisoned with unhappiness
and bound to worries and fear.

Deep in me
I knew the answer,
but all that I heard
and believed
in the last few years
has taught me
that you are not important
and are not a help to start out with.
I believed
this false doctrine,
and that was
like the key
that kept my prison doors locked.

I was so deeply stuck
in my own faults
that I was no longer receptive
to your love,
and even got angry
every time someone mentioned
your name.

Oh how could I be so dumb
and allowed myself to be
led astray
when I know deep down
that only you
give the love
that I had been longing for
the whole time!!!

Lord help me
to tear down the trash
with which I have obstructed
the access to your love.
Help me
to align myself with you again.
Help me,
so that I can
experience your love
all new again.


Theme:   What keeps me from experiencing true love

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