(3110052255-2359,2306120646-0717)
It will be
years
before I
understand
the reason
for what
you have caused
me to go through.
But one thing is for sure:
it totally
threw me off course.
My whole existence
was shaken,
my hopes
and dreams scattered.
Earlier I
saw life with pink colors
but for a
long time
I could
only see black.
But slowly I can feel
that there
are other colors.
Colors that
I would otherwise
not have
realized
because
life is far more
than hope
and disappointment.
Sometimes I wonder
what would
have come of me
if I would
have gotten
all of my
wishes and my will.
I would
probably be
so busy
with myself
that I
could not see
my
surroundings in a real sense.
Career,
entertainment
and lust
would be
on the list
of things
that were
desperately to be done.
I would
have repressed
any
possible feelings of guilt
that necessary
restoration and
management
of them
would not
have found a place
even at the
bottom of my list.
It’s YOUR fault
that I had
to endure
all this
suffering.
It was YOU
who robbed
me
of my joy
for a long
time.
Because of
YOU
I cannot do
many things
now.
I could have really
let you have it.
Until one day I realized
there was
a more
important reason
and you
knew
why you
locked my door.
YOU changed
everything.
YOU
examined me
through and
through.
By that YOU
gave me the chance
to
recognize my true self.
But YOU did not
leave me alone
in this process.
YOU locked
one door
while
opening another one
and waited
patiently
until I
decided
to turn
around.
Now you gave me new friends,
people who
understand
my
situation quite well.
I no longer
need to buy
the
attention of others
at all cost
and plead
to find
an open
ear.
It’s YOUR fault
that I am
doing better now.
I can thank
YOU
that I now
have friends
who value
and respect me.
YOU were
the teacher
who trained
me
in a new
job.
YOU came up
with the
idea
to throw me
out of my nest
because it
had long been
too small
for me
and I did
not know
that I
could fly.
YOU,
for a long
time
I was not
sure
if I should
love
or hate YOU
for what
you did to me.
But by now
I am
wondering more and more
it there
was a bit of love
in all the
sorrow.
Themes: Why God sometimes allows bad things to happen
From
accusations to thankfulness
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